The Vatican, the institutional guardian of the Roman Catholic Church, does not have its eye on the ball. This could not be clearer than the recent headlines on the College of Cardinals and the political intriques surrounding their selection.
While the world continues to look for some sign that the institution is working through its denial of the magnitude of the child abuse scandals, what the world sees is yet another insider political intrigue played out on the world’s stage.
Whitney Houston’s death yesterday is the first time I’ve learned of a major news event from “the social medial” – in my case Facebook. For all of my life (until yesterday) major news was always prefaced by “we interrupt this program to bring you…” For my parents, it was the radio, for my great-grandparents it was the newspaper. Now social media. News channels continue to evolve…
The next weeks, perhaps months, various media channels – newspaper, radio, TV, social networks, will turn from a superficial look at “how” Whitney died to generating a judgement on her life itself. The channels will clog on commentaries and analysis that judges her life. Was she “good” or “bad”? Why did her life go wrong? How could her life have gone wrong with all of her fame and fortune?
The true “how” of Whitney Houston’s death is news, as in items like the coroner’s report, any information that might suggest criminal activity, recaps of her life’s impact on music, or other “news” items that may be uncovered about her death. What makes me grumpy is that the media will not focus on the news; instead, it will spend untold hours on judging her life. This will be called “analysis.” This is not analysis of the news, not even gossip, but pure vicarious pleasure received from judging someone else’s life. People “get off” looking at sins of the famous and judging them. Because the media channels will receive a high rate of “hits” when engaging in this voyeurism, and these ratings translate into money, then all pretend that this is either “ok” or “inevitable.” After all, there’s money to be made there. Time for a grump!
THE GRUMP: This is not an issue of “rights” – the media certainly has the right to pursue profit by all legal means. And to the extent that media is part of the press, they have the right to freely publish. It is a “morality” issue. Judging the lives of the famous is not a news function. Nor is it a public function. Sin, judgement, and forgiveness are intimate and private functions outside the public scope. In fact, when sin and judgement enter the realm of the public collateral damage is almost guaranteed – without any accountability for the damage done. So while legally correct and at least on the superficial level financially rewarding this voyeuristic judgement of people’s lives is morally reprehensible.
And here the accountability issue arises. On the one side are media moguls who have exploited a ready channel for profits – pushing this type of information is financially rewarding. On the other side is, well, us. The public. Those of us who watch (and are measured as watching by Nielsen or the new tools of the social media) these public free-for-alls where we get to all be gods and pass judgement on the life of the deceased. Because that person is famous or rich or powerful or all three the Public gets vicarious pleasure out of its role of god and judge. The media racks up profits. The moral quality of our life goes down. It makes me GRUMPY.
There’s nothing new about this process, it began with the development of mass media, perhaps earlier! Nor is there a realistic chance to eliminate it: people “get off” on judging others, especially the rich, powerful and famous, and that vicarious pleasure gained by looking at a famous person and “bringing them down” will remain part of the human experience. However the process has an ebb and flow. There are times when it is a very small part of “the news,” usually in times of crisis, war, etc. There are times when it almost replaces news and becomes the primary product of the media channel. Unfortunately we seem to be at a “high tide.”
Nor is “judging” the same as critical analysis of a person’s work. In the case of Whitney Houston, it is indeed a time for an evaulation of her music – and here criticism is certainly legitimate. A person’s “product” – the music of a diva, the policies of a politician, the plays of a sport star, are indeed items where opinions will be expressed and will vary greatly. But too little of this will happen, and too much focus will be on judging her life and the way she lived it.
While whispering a prayer tonight for Whitney and her family I also pray that we, the public, will begin to pull back from this practice and instead look with humanity and compassion on those who’s performances enrich our daily lives. And that we look into the mirror and ask ourselves why we “get off” judging the lives of others. It is a bad habit!
Thursday, February 9, 2012 — Salem, VA
Today the Schmitt family sadly lays to rest Rick Schmitt. Husband, brother, father, grandfather (!), cousin, friend, colleague. Perhaps the right word is lament – that sense of grief, loss, and mourning as a loved one leaves our presence.
Rick SchmittRick was my cousin. While our families spent time together when we were young, like many cousins, as we grew older we traveled down different roads. I found myself looking around today at his wake and seeing many faces for the first time – more cousins, his wife, his children, his grandchildren, his friends. I found myself lamenting the loss of connection. So much of his life was unknown to me: I didn’t know of his profession, didn’t know his wife and children, only learned now of the great passions of his life.
Still, cousins are special. An unknown sage expressed it clearly:
Cousins are usually the first friends we have as children. No one will ever understand the idiosyncrasies of your family better than your cousins. Even if you don’t get to meet them often.
What makes cousins into first friends? Why is there that deep sense of belonging whenever, however rarely, we gather together? Perhaps it is the shared adults. My parents, after all, are my cousins’ uncle and aunt. Their parents are my uncle and aunt. We shared the same grandparents. We do indeed understand the idiosyncrasies of our family and perhaps it is that shared experience that creates a bond. And yet we cousins grew older we headed in many directions…
It is not surprising that, as the Schmitt family tree grew – the Schmitt / Hall, the Dibley / Schmitt, the Schmitt / Miller, the Miller / Schmitt and the May / Schmitt branches, each of us sought out our own path. Another writer recently turned to Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet for insight into this reality:
The question of the play (Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet) is this: Which love is pre-eminent? Is it the love to which you are born — your family, your religion and your tradition — the love of one’s own? Or is it the acquired love, the one you have chosen?
As children we cousins were an important part of each other’s early lives. As we became adults we began to pursue our heart’s passions and desires. Sometimes that means staying close to “one’s own” and sometimes it means finding a different path. It is lamentable that these paths often result in separation from the first friends of our childhood, our cousins. And yet no distance can take away he understanding that runs deep and is there even if we don’t get to see each other often.
As we grow older we also share new types of loss. Marie, Betty and Irene have all left us. All three women touched us deeply and either gave us life or helped shape our lives. And now we also share the loss of a sibling. Terri and Rick both torn from us by cancer. Once again we share terrible losses. Once again it is cousins who understand without being told what it means.
So today perhaps a simple prayer is in order – that we find a way, in spite of the distance, to connect as often as we can. While late, perhaps there is still time to learn much about my cousin – from his family, his friends, the great gift of his life. – Requiem Æternam